It happens so frequently. Your feelings are hurt. Or there is not enough sex in your relationship. Or there is too much. Or the dishes are stacking up and you are tired of washing them. Or you just aren't feeling "it" anymore...
What to do? You have a choice:
CHOICE A: Hold it all in and wait to have an emotional outburst, or a heart attack. Your lover should be able to read your mind, right?
CHOICE B: Open your mouth and say what is on your mind.
Guess which option I favor?
But how do you talk about situations and problems that are sensitive or difficult? Here are a few tips for having a conversation about anything hard as concrete feel a little more like marshmallows:
1. Don't tell him a few days ahead that, "we need to talk." Keep thy mouth closed until you are ready to talk. Once you say that phrase the talk has begun.
2. Talk during the day, not at night. Both of you will be tired and defensive. Saturday at noon is far superior to Saturday at midnight. Make an appointment to hang out and talk during that time.
3. Don't talk at home with the two of you alone. Take him for a walk outside or at the mall so the issue, no matter how sensitive, can be controlled.
3. If you are talking to a man, don't stare into his eyes. For most women that equals honesty. For men that frequently feels like confrontation.
4. Don't hem and haw. State your question and see what he says...
Do you have any other ideas on how to make "hard" talk softer? I'd love to hear them....
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