Monday, February 11, 2013

Don't Tell Someone Something They Already Know

advice - solicitation = DANGER

There is a really lovely young woman at a business I frequent who has awful skin. I am not sure what exactly is going on--I luckily never had bad skin growing up. But in her case it is rather severe and I'm sure causes her a great deal of insecurity. 

We talk a lot as I see her most days and today I almost (stupidly) asked her what she was doing to treat her condition. 

Luckily, I did not. 

It's a human impulse, and a puritanical instinct, to want to "help" and I dealt with my thoughts in the appropriate fashion--I considered it and did not say a word. 

Take it from someone who gets paid to make observations about people--it's a tough business. We all live in the land of the mirror and I am sure she realizes her skin issues has social, as well as personal, implications. She may be actively suffering from it daily or may not care--I don't know and I'm not going to inquire. My reaction to her face is my issue--not hers. I kept my mouth shut. If she wants advice, opinions or strategies on skin care I will do all I can to help. But she a'int asking so I'm not telling. 

The next time you have a similar desire to talk to someone about their weight, or their girlfriend, or their finances, ask yourself "do they know this already?" If the answer is "yes," or even "probably," I suggest you keep your mouth shut.

Not that you asked my opinion..... :)


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